If you need to quit an addiction, does anyone need to join you? Nope. You can do it all by yourself.

The goal now is to stay sober...not to be a perfect spouse, parent, neighbor. Not to make anyone happy. You can do that later. For now, less overwhelm means do less.

We spent a lot of mental energy on how much we’d be able to drink with people instead of focusing on building a relationship based on real things…like personalities, interests, commonalities, etc. If they drank, we figured the rest would fall into place.

The key is to have support. We all need help at different times in our lives, and “help” can look different based on where we’re at. We’re not meant to do any part of life alone, especially something as difficult as crushing an addiction!

I no longer guard my drinking time like a dragon in front of gold. Now my time with my kids is the gold.

From the outside looking in, it seems like the frat party never stopped. It just dressed up in suits and ties and moved into a conference center. After work drinks. Drinks with clients. A free-flowing bar in the office. Sales conventions. Trade shows. How do you navigate these landmines sober?!

I felt like a fraud. Hubsy and I meandered around the silent auction with glasses in hand. He had gin and tonic; I had tonic water with a lime. They looked exactly the same, and I felt guilty.

Some people can do moderation and others can’t. The others are “all or nothing” kind of people.

10 responses you can use when people ask why you’re not drinking:

1. I have a busy day tomorrow and need to sleep well tonight.

2. Alcohol fogs up my brain too much.

3. I’m detoxing.

4. I’m trying to lose a few pounds for… (fill in the blank).

5. Alcohol gives me diarrhea.

6. I’m designated driver tonight.

7. Alcohol bloats me and this shirt is too tight for that.

8. I don’t like the taste.

9. I don’t feel like it.

10. I’m training to climb a mountain.

Now you have a voice in your head that says you shouldn’t stop. Many times that voice doesn’t show up until you’re ready to stop. Why would it bother you if you’re merrily drinking along? That’s your alcohol voice. It doesn’t want you to stop drinking, so it starts talking to you.