In my early 30s, I became a health nut. Then I started drinking and everything fell apart.

If you need to quit an addiction, does anyone need to join you? Nope. You can do it all by yourself.

If you're sobercurious and interested in quitting alcohol for a specific time period or forever, you may be wondering how to get started. The obvious answer is "quit drinking", but the real answer is more complicated than that.

We spent a lot of mental energy on how much we’d be able to drink with people instead of focusing on building a relationship based on real things…like personalities, interests, commonalities, etc. If they drank, we figured the rest would fall into place.

I felt like a fraud. Hubsy and I meandered around the silent auction with glasses in hand. He had gin and tonic; I had tonic water with a lime. They looked exactly the same, and I felt guilty.

You are not alone. Even though it might feel like it. Especially at first. There is so much shame wrapped up in drinking too much that you might choose not to tell anyone you’re struggling.

It’s time I told you the truth. I can’t hide anymore because it’s too big a part of who I am. I’m a Christian. My entire lens, identity, focus, day-to-day thoughts and actions are all wrapped up in that one solid fact.

Sometimes “normal” gets you everywhere. Day 100! I made it, and I’m really proud of myself. I’ve only been here once before in my attempt to sober up.

I hope this tenseness goes away at some point. I hope I find another way to soothe because I am NOT going to start drinking again. Not tonight. Not a sip. I’ll take the angst over the numb any day. At least it pushes me to production. At least I am awake. Alive.

Instead of having a superhero group of friends and hunky husband swoop in to support you in your sober recovery, you’re going to get a few other responses when you tell people you’re not drinking or getting ready to quit.