The goal now is to stay sober...not to be a perfect spouse, parent, neighbor. Not to make anyone happy. You can do that later. For now, less overwhelm means do less.

I felt like a fraud. Hubsy and I meandered around the silent auction with glasses in hand. He had gin and tonic; I had tonic water with a lime. They looked exactly the same, and I felt guilty.

10 responses you can use when people ask why you’re not drinking:

1. I have a busy day tomorrow and need to sleep well tonight.

2. Alcohol fogs up my brain too much.

3. I’m detoxing.

4. I’m trying to lose a few pounds for… (fill in the blank).

5. Alcohol gives me diarrhea.

6. I’m designated driver tonight.

7. Alcohol bloats me and this shirt is too tight for that.

8. I don’t like the taste.

9. I don’t feel like it.

10. I’m training to climb a mountain.

Instead of having a superhero group of friends and hunky husband swoop in to support you in your sober recovery, you’re going to get a few other responses when you tell people you’re not drinking or getting ready to quit.

9:47am. I’m at work and stressed. I can feel my shoulders knotting. I’m a tightly wound ball ready to “throw hands” as my super cool tween says.

I couldn’t drink because I couldn’t handle it. I’m an all or nothing person, and since I didn’t want to be an “all alcohol” person, I had to be a “no alcohol” person. I couldn’t live in the middle like some people can.

I’ll use these sober tools as needed. Because I’m not drinking today.